what they don’t tell you about going no contact is that even though you’ll feel some immediate relief at not accumulating any more of their bullshit every single day, there’s also the backlog of hurtful things that go on hurting, for years, quietly smoldering away. and it’s the same stuff often going round and round, like part of me knew i couldn’t put up with it any longer, but another part of me hasn’t caught up yet, hasn’t yet accepted that nothing is ever going to change, that it wasn’t going to before and it certainly isn’t going to now, you’re never going to convince them of their wickedness or change their mind about anything, and so it keeps on going round, a terrible carousel of despicable behavior, and it won’t stop hurting.
smolder